What happens in Vegas!

So there is this long story about Jade and I needing to pick a car up for Thad that was in an impound lot in North Las Vegas. I like Vegas, North Las Vegas, has some pretty scary parts in it. I decided to pack of cooler of drinks, a bag of fruit snacks and peanut M&M's for our 6 hour excursion to Vegas and back. 2 hours there, an hour to get the car and 2 hours to get back.

I said a prayer while we were driving that everything would go smoothly, so off we go!!!

The DVD player in the van is stuck so we can only we watch Speed Racer, so I have listened to that at least 5 times this last month. We find the inpound lot without a lot of problems. We pull up and there is nowhere to park but a poorly marked handicapped spot. Imagine if you will the secretary at Monsters Inc., this is what she sounded like "Do you have a handicapped sticker? You need to move." So about an hour later they dig the Maserati out of the middle of the lot. It was having a problem shifting so all of a sudden Jade takes off and is gone. So I buckle in the kids and try to follow him.
There was traffic on the freeway which was good because the car kept stalling. Jade takes an exit and ends up at the old American Stone building. No big deal, we wired the new American Stone building with phones, so we knew the owners so it would be ok. The car will not shift anymore so Jade is reading the manual trying to figure out what to do.
I let the kids out to run because we were on a mostly deserted street. Oh, across the street from us was the Pussycats strip lounge! Pretty soon Tate and Ty are laughing like crazy and Tate's shirt is wet and I hear "Mom I was peeing so high it got all over my shirt. It was awesome." No big deal, it will dry and we will be home soon.
About 2 hours later we take off for Jack in the Box to get some food. The kids have been great and had juice boxes and fruit snacks. As were are leaving Jack in the Box there is a guy outside with two huge dogs. One dog projectile vomits on my pants and shoes! Alright, this is funny. I get in the van and Jade is mad at me because he thought I spilled his lemonade all over. No, it was dog puke!
Come to find out, the car broke down about a mile away from the only Maserati shop in the state of Nevada. We raced to the place before it closed, they called a tow truck and we waited with a man named George. It was like 10 p.m. by now and we got it to the shop and he says "Oh, by the way, we are closed for the night." So it is off to Circus Circus we go. I drop Jade off to check in and Tayla says "I really have to pee." By the time she told me she was already bouncing up and down trying not to pee. I grabbed a cup ripped her pants down as she started to pee in the van. She missed the cup and peed on her pants!
Here is a recap 1. Tate peed on his shirt 2. Tayla peed on her pants 3. Ty won't pee because he wants to pee in a toilet 4. Tori has already pooped twice!
We ordered a pizza and threw the kids in the tub. I washed peed on clothes in the sink with a bar of soap and turned the heater up to dry the clothes. They were all dry in the morning, thank goodness. We got a call at 9 in the morning that the car would take at least a week to fix!
Now Robert and I were talking and he said "You know you are on the right dose of medication when a dog pukes on you and you laugh about it."
Believe it or not I saw the Lord's hand in so many ways, I am going to list them quickly.
1. Jade and I both charged our phones the night before.
2. That car was broke and shouldn't have made it out of the lot. But we made it to a "safe" part of Vegas.
3. I had a stack of diapers in the van that I kept forgetting to take to my Mom's house.
4. I packed a cooler although I thought I was being crazy.
5. Seriously a mile away from the only Maserati dealership in Nevada.
6. My kids were so nice and good.
7. Ty came up with a nice dance move and says"We're in Vegas baby."
I have been working on this post for two weeks so I am posting as is, sorry for the typos and the inability to make my words flow!